Josh and I had been married for 8 months when we learned that we were expecting a baby that next June! We were so excited to meet the sweet spirit we already loved so much. We had a boy name picked out so when we learned that we were having a little man, our hopes were confirmed. He was the first grandbaby on my side and some of Josh’s sisters are unable to get pregnant so we decided to do an ultra-sound with all the sisters. It was such a neat experience to have all my sisters and Moms there to see him and the feeling in the room was one I will never forget. I was instantly attached to this boy we called Mac. He had so much personality already; in every ultra-sound he played pick-a-boo, moved enough that I thought he was doing back flips every day, and constantly had the hiccups.
My pregnancy went well until the end when I started to retain water and was diagnosed with preeclampsia. Because of that we were going in for routine non-stress tests to monitor Mac’s health and to determine when delivery was necessary. I was going in every other day and everything still looked great. Because of all the additional ultra-sounds I was able to have with Mac, I grew fond of him and had a bond I knew no one could break. The morning before my last non-stress test, two days before my due date, Mac was not moving but I had felt him the night before so was not worried. My Mom came with me to my appointment because Josh had to get some work done before I had McKallister. I knew something was wrong as soon as the nurse started the ultrasound. The look in her eyes was not the same that I had become so accustomed to seeing.
My pregnancy went well until the end when I started to retain water and was diagnosed with preeclampsia. Because of that we were going in for routine non-stress tests to monitor Mac’s health and to determine when delivery was necessary. I was going in every other day and everything still looked great. Because of all the additional ultra-sounds I was able to have with Mac, I grew fond of him and had a bond I knew no one could break. The morning before my last non-stress test, two days before my due date, Mac was not moving but I had felt him the night before so was not worried. My Mom came with me to my appointment because Josh had to get some work done before I had McKallister. I knew something was wrong as soon as the nurse started the ultrasound. The look in her eyes was not the same that I had become so accustomed to seeing.
Our world shattered as we learned that Mac didn’t have a heart beat and had passed away sometime during the night. My Mom comforted me as we waited for Josh, our parents, brothers and sisters to arrive at the hospital to be with us. I learned a lot about my family during this heartbreaking time. Each one had a strength or quality that I needed in order to get through this trying time. They all stayed with us throughout the night and into the early morning as I progressed through labor.
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A week after I had Oakland I started to notice some leg pain and swelling, went in to the emergency room and had a blood clot that ranged from my calf to my thigh. I was hospitalized for a week during which time Josh took care of our newborn girl on his own. He did a great job but I was anxious to get back to her. After being released and home for a few days I went back in when the pain worsened. The clot had spread from my ankle to my abdomen and I was in the hospital for an additional week. We learned that I have a clotting disorder, so was put on blood thinner that I would take the remainder of my child baring years at least.
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Because I was on blood thinner and had lost a previous baby I was considered a very high risk pregnancy so was able to have ultra-sounds every other week. At 14 weeks I started to bleed but ultra-sounds didn’t show anything abnormal. We learned at that time that we were having another baby boy and let Oakland name him, Quincy. I went in twice a week for a few weeks until the bleeding stopped. By that time the sickness had all but disappeared and it looked like it was going to be a great pregnancy from there on out.
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When Camden was 3 we decided to adopt again, found an amazing pregnant Momma that immediately accepted us with open arms. We were invited to Dr appointments and ultrasounds and then Cali was lucky enough to be there for his birth!
Josh and I feel blessed to have the five children we have, we have learned so much about God's plan for us and are humbled by those that have reached out to us during these times. We have such a strong testimony of the atonement, resurrection and plan of salvation. We know that these experiences have been the journey that will bring us to you and wouldn't change any of it. We are ecstatic to add to our family once again, adoption is such a miracle and something that we are honored to be a part of.
I couldn't stop crying as I read your blog. I am amazed at your family. you have endured so much it is no wonder you were chosen parents of such special children. I hope you know that you have a strong spirit and I can feel it just through reading your blog. Thank you for your strong testimonies and your example. I am excited for you for the day you will get to be with your whole family....and I hope you are blessed soon with a new addition to your family... best of luck and prayers are coming your way!!!
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